Tuesday, January 10, 2012

THE USURPER

so my mum is the resident sister Jesus and helps all the 'helpless' she can see. this means that ive had gazillions of cousins and friends of friends live with us from time to time. being the lazy dolt that i am, i didnt really mind coz the did most of my chores anyway(what? i didnt ask. they just did). these cousins have been around at our home since i was around 10 and are usually way older than me hence im still the little one and usually got along pretty well. enter 2012 and my mother, after a year of being just us decides to embark on another 'crusade' to save my cousin who btw happens to be younger than me(wth). so after christmas and our dutiful 5 day visit to the boondocks, we had an extra person in tow. i was sulking coz a few minutes earlier we'd had the usual family conference we have just before we acquire a new family member. it usually means cut backs on our spending money(so not fair!!) and less to no family holidays or impulsive day outs. my brother could be bothered because he has moved out and has a freakin job!!! so he has this super smug smile on his face. so long journey back home and im still sulking at the reduction of my already inadequate(what? i wanted more) allowance and sneaking murderous looks at my cousin who is serenely seated next to me in the back seat like she's been there her whole life. she's a goody two shoes(btw, you, yeah, you know urself, i aint in her league. she's that good) who does everything that is expected of a girl. a good cook, cleans the house like someone with OCD and is generally hardworking. in short, all the things that im not.
so we arrive at home with me heading straight to the bedroom to nap before we go out to eat dinner(it was still early. 5-ish). i barely lay my head on the pillow when mummy dearest calls out. apparently, we are not eating out(fudging cut backs!!) and the meat we bought in town is not supposed to go to the freezer but its supposed to be cooked. TONIGHT!! BY ME!!! WTH. I try the mummy i have a migrane card and could my cousin please do the cooking? she loves cooking. mum gives me a stern look and starts talking about how the kid(wth! thats me!) is really tired(yeah and i have an instant refresh super power ) and has a headache(hey, thats my excuse!!) and is still confused about the surroundings(kid, the room with the cooker and sink is the kitchen. there, unconfused). many mumblings and grumblings later i dump the food in serving dishes and report that the food is ready and you can go serve yourselves thank you. my brother, the lout, starts complaining about how if we were back in the motherland, id have to serve him and blah blah blah(i shoulda spit in his food). anyway, day one goes uneventful(for the others. i was pretty pissed off) and day two comes. kid spends half day in bed(wth. does she have my life in a script or something?) and i get landed with the grunt work of making the house safe for human living again(had been empty for a month). day 3 kid wakes up and sits down watching the house help(me) work like a donkey(ok. wasnt alot of work but its still work!!), then starts watching tv seeming unconcerned. later that day my mum makes me go to the shop because the KID is scared of walking alone(hello, whats she gonna do when i go back to school huh??). dinner time and im supposed to cook again! this time im putting the foot down!! mum tries to sweet talk me(uh, where is my mother??? she never makes me do anything!!!) saying how she loves how i cook that kind of food while the little imposter is staring steadily at me. i swear if you look closely you can see the triumphant smug little smile on her face!!@#$%. i stand my ground and absolutely refuse to enter the kitchen(until mum gives that doe eye look. aaaargh!) i know it seems pretty petty but ive been the last born and the 'baby' to my mum all my life and i really do not appreciate a little upstart barging her way to my mother's affections. SHE'S MINE!!(i occasionally lend her to my brother. :)). so anyway its like my mother senses whats going on and has a talk with me that night about how we should give the poor kid a chance as life has not been easy for her. im ashamed then. feeling jealous because my younger cousin has wormed her way to my mother's heart and of how self centered i'd been(no. im not ashamed for being self centered but it sounded like a good thing to feel at that moment).so put on my good sport face and agree to be the donkey for the remaining time(its only a day). part of me is disappointed. id half hoped that there would be a big showdown with me reclaiming my title, but then i realized it never was gone. i just thought that. i am my mother's lastborn and no one(apart from God-think sarah) can change that. and while she's a visitor, im a permanent fixture(eeew. now i sound like those motivational speakers i love to hate).
ps.
in my defense here is what those guys who are not really doctors but have a dr. before their name say:
Last Born
Youngest children tend to be the most free-spirited due to their parents' increasingly laissez-faire attitude towards parenting the second (or third, or fourth, or fifth...) time around. The baby of the family tends to be:
  • Fun-loving
  • Uncomplicated
  • Manipulative
  • Outgoing
  • Attention-seeker
  • Self-centered
 p.s/ again. hehe. i kept trying to upload images but this thing didnt want to cooperate. im moving to wordpress(darn! what was my password again???)